Monday, May 16, 2011

Open Letter Mondays

An Open Letter To Everyone I Know Whom I Have Ever Ignored Whilst Passing By Them On The Street

Dear People I've Ignored Whilst Passing By You On The Street (or other places),

It's not you. It's me. And I'm sorry.

I have a perfect-storm situation of terrible eyesight, bad memory for names and faces, and a tendency to live so much inside my own head that I am usually not paying attention. Seriously, it's like a Michael Bay picture crossed with a horror movie in there. With experimental dance. You have no idea. It's exhausting. Sometimes it's so bad that I have trouble walking without veering off of the sidewalk and into oncoming traffic. External stimuli are so hard for me to sort through that yesterday I couldn't even succesfully buy a cup of tea but had to back out of the store apologetically with my hands around my face like blinders (blinders! Brilliant. Note to self - make pair of human-sized blinders. Also, find coffee shop that has fewer options).

People who know be pretty well have gotten used to having to jump in front of me and wave their hands frantically to get my attention. It's a pretty good test of friendship, actually, when someone is willing to overlook those weird, annoying idiosyncracies (of which I think I have more than most people, anyway).

So, for anyone I overlooked and/or appeared to ignore, I apologize. Next time, just trip me. That works pretty well.

Sincerely (and apologetically),


  1. HAHA! So true. I think I actually smacked you in the nose once to get your attention when you were getting off the MU shuttle. It still took you like 5 seconds of looking around to realize who did it.

  2. I have a cure for that, but you won't like it. Get a pony that is paying attention to EVERYTHING and over-reacting to EVERYTHING. You will have to notice EVERYTHING before the pony does, so you can counter-react to EVERYTHING. Physically learning is the best way, using pain to reinforce re-learned behaviors.